Portraits

• Ida had diabetes and was facing amputation of her foot. The day before surgery, she wrote notes to her grandkids and overdosed on her pain medications.

• Aaron had been unable to work due to complications from the hazardous chemicals he used at his job. He was now running out of money. He’d been turned down for Medicaid, Medicare, and disability payments, despite his chronic illness. He did not want to be a burden to his family, so the month that he ran out of money he gave away his valuables and cleaned up his apartment. He found a home for his cat and put a gun to his head.

• Victor drove off a bridge the night before his graduation from college. Afterward his parents found out that he had been failing all his classes—because he wasn’t attending them—and he had been told that he would not be allowed to graduate.

• Raysha got very drunk at a high school drinking party and made a fool of herself. Humiliated, she left the party, focusing on all the other stupid things she’d done lately. When she came to the railroad tracks, she decided to wait for a train.

Definitions and Key Thoughts

• Suicide is the tragic and lethal culmination of a psychological process that results from unresolved events that create depression and hopelessness.

• Someone who is considering suicide cannot see any hope that the future will be different than the painful past or present.

• The risk of suicide is greatest within the first year after a failed attempt.

• Males tend to use more violent means for suicide (guns, cars) and are more often successful than women.

• Females tend to attempt suicide more often than men but are less often successful at the attempt because they use less lethal means (pills, cutting).

• Suicide and substance abuse often go hand in hand. Substances are involved in 20–50 percent of suicides.

• Depressed people are more at risk of suicide after depression starts to abate. A person who was inert with depression may become decisive with new energy—enough energy to commit suicide.

• Those who have recently begun antidepressants may be more at risk because  their energy level may rise before their mood does.

• Suicidal individuals suffer from tunnel vision. They do not see any option except death. To them, suicide is a “logical” thing to do. That’s why suicidal individuals sometimes end up taking the lives of others as they kill themselves they are not seeing the big picture.

• Always take seriously the threat of suicide.

Assessment of Suicide

If you think that someone you know might be suicidal, do not panic. Stay calm and know that by coming to you this person has already taken a step away from the decision to harm himself.

Don’t contradict the suicidal person. Empathy is more helpful. You won’t argue him out of how he feels.

Rule Outs:

(Questions to ask either the suicidal person or the person who is afraid for another)

Q1 Are you feeling as if you want to harm yourself?

Q2 If so, how would you do this?

Q3  Do you ever wish you were dead?

Q4  When was the last time you felt that way?

Q5  Have you thought about how you would try to kill yourself?

Q6  Are there weapons at home?

Q7  If so, are they locked up? Who can get to them?

Q8  Have you ever attempted to hurt yourself in the past? If so, when? (A recent, nearly lethal attempt may indicate that this person is very serious in his Desire to die. Numerous unsuccessful suicide attempts could indicate that the individual uses suicide attempts to gain attention. However, either way you must take the suicide talk seriously.)

General Questions for the Suicidal Person

Q9  How old are you?

Q10  Have you recently had a baby? (the person may be suffering from post-partum depression)

Q11  Have you suffered a recent loss?

Q12  What has happened recently to make you feel so hopeless?

Q13  Do you ever abuse drugs or alcohol?

Q14  If so, when did you last use?

Q15  How often and how much do you use?

Q16  Has anyone in your family committed suicide?

Q17  If so, who was it?

Q18  How old were you when it happend?

Q19 What happened?

Q20  Do you know why it occurred?

Q21  How did it make you feel?

Q22  Is there someone you’d like to get revenge on? Is there anyone you are very angry at? Have you ever thought of death as the ultimate revenge?

Q23  What is most distressing to you when you think about the future?

Q24  Can you think of any reasons to go on living?

Q25  What would make life worth living for you? See if you can list ten things. Are any of them within reach?

Q26  Where are you spiritually?

Q27  Do you think that God cares if you live or die?

General Questions for the Friend or Family Member:

Q9  How old is your loved one?

Q10  Does he/she suffer from any painful or debilitating medical conditions?

Q11  Has this person suffered a recent loss or recently had a baby?

Q12  If not, are there any other recent distressing circumstances?

Q13  Is there a family history of suicide?

Q14 Does this person abuse alcohol or drugs?

Q15  If so, has he/she ever tried to stop?

Q16  Has your loved one’s behavior changed recently?

Q17  If so, in what ways

Q18  Has this person been taking care of himself/herself physically?

Q19  Is he/she sleeping regularly (i.e., not sleeping too much or too little)?

Q20  Has your loved one been giving away prized posessions?

Q21  Has he/she seemed uninterested in plans for the future?

Q22  Has he/she made jokes about death or disappearing?

Q23  Is this person extremely angry?

Q24  Would he/she like to get revenge on someone?

Q25  Could suicide be a form of revenge for him/her?

Wise Counsel

Protecting the suicidal person must take priority. Don’t worry about embarrassing the person by calling paramedics—better embarrassed than dead.

While some Christians will resist suicide because of a belief that it is a sin, such rules are often meaningless to those with tunnel vision.
 

Although it may comfort discouraged or sad people to know that God loves them, suicidal people are often too depressed to believe it. Avoid trite spiritual platitudes.

Action Steps

1.Get Help Immediately

• Call police or paramedics if this person has a plan and the means to commit suicide. He or she must be protected.